Talk about it like it’s an adventure
Kids pick up on your energy. If you’re nervous or unsure, they will be too. Instead of building it up as this massive change, talk about nursery in a way that feels fun and exciting. Mention the toys they’ll get to play with, the friends they’ll make, and how grown up they are now.
You can even read books together about starting nursery. Keep it light. No pressure. Just gentle chats here and there so the idea becomes familiar.
Start doing little practice runs
If your child hasn’t spent much time away from you before, that first drop-off can be a bit of a shock. To ease them into it, try leaving them with a trusted friend or relative for short bursts of time. Even half an hour here and there can help them build the confidence to be without you.
It’s not about pushing them too hard too soon. It’s just giving them a chance to realize that you always come back, and they’re absolutely fine in the meantime.
Sleep can go a bit sideways
This is more common than people admit, especially when big changes are on the horizon. If your toddler waking up every night in the run-up to starting nursery, it could be a sign they’re feeling unsettled. They might not be able to tell you they’re anxious or excited, so it shows up in their sleep instead.
Try to keep bedtime routines really calm and consistent. Same time, same steps, same comfort items. If they wake, keep things low-key. Reassure them but try not to overdo it. Often, once they settle into nursery and start to feel secure there, the night-waking starts to ease off on its own.
Visit the nursery together
This one’s a game-changer. If your child can see the place, meet the staff, and even have a little play before their first proper day, it’ll make a big difference. Most nurseries are happy for you to pop in a couple of times so it’s not a total unknown.
Let your child explore a bit at their own pace. Don’t force them to join in if they’re shy. Even just sitting and watching the other kids helps them get used to it. And you’ll probably feel a lot better once you’ve seen it all in action too.
Let them make some choices
Little kids don’t get to decide much in life, so letting them have a bit of say here and there can really boost their confidence. Let them pick their backpack, choose which teddy to take in, or decide what they want for breakfast on nursery days.
It’s not about letting them run the show. It’s just helping them feel like they’re part of the process, instead of having it all done to them.
Get into the nursery routine early
Try to start shifting your routine to match nursery timings a week or two before they start. If you can, get wake-up and bedtime a bit closer to what they’ll be doing once nursery kicks in. Same goes for meal and snack times.
That way, their body clock starts to adjust, and you’re not suddenly trying to drag a tired, grumpy child out of bed on day one. Mornings will go much more smoothly (for both of you).
Don’t overpack the nursery bag
There’s always the temptation to pack everything they’ve ever owned, just in case. But nursery staff are pros. They’ll tell you what they actually need. Usually it’s just a change of clothes, nappies if they’re still in them, maybe a comfort item, and weather-appropriate bits like a coat or sunhat.
Labelling everything is helpful too. Even socks. You’d be surprised how quickly things go missing when 15 toddlers are all getting changed at once.
Keep goodbyes short and sweet
This one’s hard, but it really helps. Dragging out a goodbye tends to make things harder for both of you. Even if your child cries (and lots do), a quick hug, a kiss, and a confident “Have the best day! I’ll see you soon!” works better than a slow, emotional exit.
Kids usually settle within minutes once you’re gone. The longer you linger, the more it can drag things out. Trust the staff. They’ve seen every kind of drop-off and they know how to handle it.
Expect a few wobbles
Even if your child starts off loving nursery, there might still be a few tears some mornings. That’s normal. Starting something new is a big step, and it takes time to adjust.
Some kids cry at drop-off but are totally fine ten minutes later. Others are quiet for the first few weeks and then suddenly burst into life once they feel comfortable. Try not to read too much into the first few days. It’ll take a little while before you settle into the new normal.
Stay connected with the staff
It really helps to build a good relationship with your child’s key worker or room leader. They’ll be your go-to for updates, concerns, or just a quick chat about how things are going. And they’ll appreciate you keeping them in the loop too.
If something’s going on at home, like your child hasn’t slept well or they’re teething, let the staff know. It gives them a better understanding of your child’s mood that day and helps them support them properly.
Give yourself a bit of grace too
It’s a big deal for you as much as it is for your child. You might feel emotional, worried, or even a bit guilty. That’s all normal. Starting nursery doesn’t mean you’re handing your child over to someone else to raise. It just means they’re getting new experiences, learning through play, and making friends.
And you? You get a breather. Whether it’s going back to work, having time to run errands in peace, or just sitting with a hot drink for five minutes without being climbed on, you deserve that time too.
